The Unexpected

Four days since the last entry to my journal. It feels like a month. It's so hard to express how I feel right now. I was supposed to be here, in my ex's home for a few days to celebrate Thanksgiving with her family. There is a proverb that says "The mind of man plans his way, but the Lord directs his steps." and that is exactly what happened.

For almost 20 years I had a family, and in one day I lost that family. That event lead me to become homeless, and on my own. I got used to living on the streets. This week, in one day... I got a new family and I'm off the streets.

It is very difficult for me to type this, I'm very emotional right now. I knew it would not be easy to post this on my blog. It's the main reason why I'm doing this in the middle of the night, 11:30 pm to be exact.

Everyone is asleep in the house, a home I now live in. I sleep on the leather sofa which is heaven in comparison to where I used to sleep. I won't miss having to lay down on layers of cardboard every night, but I won't forget it either.

To wake up and know I can say "good morning" to people that actually care about me is a blessing which I'm grateful to them and to God. I try not to mention religion in my blog. I feel it is a personal choice, and I've never liked people who preach about their faith too much. My connection to the Lord is simple, I speak in private either verbally or with my thoughts and I do my best to listen.

Saturday night, my ex asked me if I could stay until Tuesday. because she needed to install a new TV at her mother's house for her birthday. I gladly agreed, another few days with a roof over my head sounded good to me.

Sunday afternoon she tells me that didn't want me to go back to the streets. She then went on to say everyone in the house had agreed to take me in. Her father, her stepmother and her husband had unanimously decided that I could live with them. The word unexpected falls short to describe the moment. If that wasn't enough, she told me I was part of her family.

Family means a lot to me, so for her to say that, knowing it was coming from her heart... it meant a lot.

Out of respect, I won't use the names of my new family, however I will show you my new furry roommates. The first two belong to my ex, the last one belongs to her father and stepmother.

This is Mushi, she barks for attention.

This is Zoe, she will eat anything.

This is Apache, the big boy.

I enjoy walking them. I had at one time considered becoming a dog walker, but I lacked the experience and reference to do it, and yeah... the fact that I was homeless sort of ended that idea.

The past few days has been a dream. I have a place to call home, where I can take a shower, keep my clothes, a safe place with good people that are helping me put my life back together. A totally unexpected situation, one which I'm glad to be in.

In the morning my ex tried to wake me up several times. The plan was for me to help her install a new TV for her mother, as a birthday gift. Instead she did it on her own, because I was deep asleep. I feel bad that when she was counting on me I wouldn't wake up. I intend to make it up to her somehow, even though she insists that it's alright. Her friendship means a lot to me.

I won't waste the opportunity she is giving me to rebuild my life. I'll share some more tomorrow.

May you walk in the light of God.

Sincerely.

Luis

A Sweet and Itchy Thankgiving

It's 5 am and I haven't slept thanks to my itchy feet which are still recovering. Even with anti-itch cream, which helped a bit. Still, last night was wonderful. The meal was great, my ex and her stepmother made everything from scratch. I met my ex's relatives. I had already met her cousin who is polite to me, not sure if she likes me or not.

Her 89 yrs old aunt who is on a wheelchair was very social, I was mostly listening to her tell me about her life. She was a lovely woman. Her son made a homemade cheesecake based on her recipe and it was beyond delicious. I haven't had homemade cheesecake in 20 years, it was decadent.

A face that I had not seeing in 16 years, was my ex's mother; who I remember being kind and loving. She reminds me of my grandma; we hugged before she went to sleep.

I walked the family's big 80 pound dog named "Apache" which was shy for a few days, before he would let me pet him. He is a loving pet and was easy to walk him around last night. I didn't know he had diarrhea, so we left some free fertilizer on the grass.

Surprisingly I was able to socialize with most of the family, even though I felt awkward at the beginning. Her father even talked about my ex's childhood, about some freaky monkey attack on his convertible, when she was a child. It was a funny story, you had to be there to get it.

I had a good time, I felt very welcomed, thank God. That is all I can share.

May you walk in the light of God.

Sincerely.

Luis

Thanksgiving from 5 to 12!

I thought when I got the Thanksgiving invitation from my ex's family, that it would be them four and me. Oh no, this is a family gathering. 12 people including me, the guy that is not part of the family.

Despite my 20's when I could get together with a ton of strangers to get high and drunk, at this point in my life, I'm socially awkward. For the 19 years I was married, the only people I socialized with, were my wife's family and their handful of friends. So it was usually 7 of us, me and my wife, her brother and his two kids, her sister and a family friend.

After Nina passed away in January of 2015, it was 5 of us, her family was the only family I knew, the only family I had. I was used to them, so birthdays and holidays went on after a few months of mourning. I did hide my depression from them, and in June of this year I survived a suicide attempt.

I got professional help, group therapy and the whole 9 yards. I thought that my family would be there for me after I was released. Instead I was given a backpack with clothes, and told by my brother in law that I was "no longer part of the family" at the parking lot outside our home.

That is how I became homeless. No family to call my own, with just what I had on me, walking the streets of Florida. Days, weeks and months went by, and I got used to it. Not having a family, or real friends that is.

I know a lot of friendly people I care about in Delray Beach, but true friendship... it wasn't in my life, until my ex found me through Facebook. What are the chances that someone you had an intense relationship with, that ended badly, would be such a loving friend after 15 years?

Now I'm in her home about to celebrate Thanksgiving with another 11 people, most who don't know me. I'm nervous, as if I'm going on a freaking date for god's sake!

Her father is a great guy, old school type that believes in hard work, and doesn't like anything handed to him. His wife is a lovely lady, that reminds me of my grandma. And there is my ex, who has given me true friendship. True friendship is rare these days, with so much bs going on in our society for the past few decades. I never finished high school, but life has educated me enough to know that usually friends come and go, but family is... or should be forever.

Here I am, with no family, but with a friend which is solid as a rock (and just as stubborn). I'm hoping I don't put my foot in my mouth. What if I'm asked what I do for a living? or where I live? yeah... socially awkward indeed.

God help me. If you're reading this, have a great Thanksgiving 👍

May you walk in the light of God.

Sincerely.

Luis

Awesome Tuesday!

After having a rough few days, I woke up Tuesday morning at 7 am. My day started in awesome mode. Thanks to Joe's girlfriend my foot was in much better shape. I had overslept a bit, which usually would bothers me, but not today.

I was able to put weight on my left foot. I checked the bandage and noticed that I would probably need to change it. I kept my foot up while I was trying to decide if I should go to the soup kitchen for breakfast. I also needed to go to Publix to get my prescription filled.

At 8:45 am I asked the manager at Dunkin Donuts (who is a nice Latina that knows my situation) if I could leave my duffel bag for a few hours. She kindly agreed and I left it at the store. I got on the Bike that my ex's husband had given me (yeah that happened too).

I was riding it carefully wearing slippers that my ex's father had given me last weekend. It was far better than the Huffy Beach Cruiser that has been stolen from me weeks ago. This baby is a 21 speed ride.

Reaching the soup kitchen a little after 9 am I ate breakfast. A few friendly homeless guys that know me asked me where I had been, so I filled them up a bit on the crazy days I had gone through. I gave a hoodie and a long sleeve shirt to 2 of them, I had brought them because I had a bit too much to carry in the duffel bag.

Talking to one of the women that work at the kitchen, I asked for some gauze and bandages and fortunately she found some. I thanked her and then left the kitchen and rode straight to the park across the Delray Courthouse. There I changed my bandage and finally saw what Joe's girlfriend had done (skip if you don't want to see it).

After I finished I rode to the nearest Publix to find out it didn't have a Pharmacy. I had to ride to another Publix but I didn't care, the minor discomfort was worth it. I got the prescription filled at no cost to me, I thanked God for this blessing.

By the time I was riding from Publix back towards Dunkin Donuts it was almost Lunch time. I had not been on a bike in weeks; the gel seat helped a bit but still my read end was asking for a short break.

I stopped a few minutes to talk to a homeless guy I know, who had been arrested Monday night for throwing a brick at the Trolley (yeah, that happened) while drunk. Apparently the driver refuses to pick him up because a while ago they had gotten into a verbal altercation where racial slurs had been exchanged. Crazy things like that happen often unfortunately. I told him to try and get sober up. Hopefully he will try, sober he is a completely different person.

Riding my bike I made it in time for lunch time at the soup kitchen. Right after I headed to DD and stayed there until 7 pm. I walked over to Starbucks with my backpack and duffel bag with only minor discomfort on my left foot.

My buddy Diana was there and she gave me a passion tea lemonade with mango and raspberry to try out.

It was delicious. So here I am, enjoying the end of my awesome Tuesday. I'll head out to my spot at 11 pm, when they close. Oh yeah I also got this.

That will be my breakfast for tomorrow. Thank God for good people.

Ok that is all for today, good night.

May you walk in the light of God.

Sincerely.

Luis

Monday Night Blessing

Monday I spent all day at Dunkin Donuts, keeping my left foot up on a chair hoping my left foot would recover from being so swollen. It didn't help at all. At about 5 pm I started to do research on how to deal with the problem based on how my foot was looking. It was looking almost as bad when I had gone to the hospital.

Most info I found recommended I popped it, drain it completely and then put a band aid on it to let it heal. Over the course of a few hours I drained it 5 times, because it kept filling up and I couldn't understand why it was doing that. I left DD right before they closed and slowly walked to the next block and sat at a metal bench there.

I was reading a book on my phone when a Delray Police patrol car stopped right in front of me. I thought "oh no... I got my foot bare and now I'm in trouble for violating some city ordinance". Then I hear "Hey Luis! how you been?" and I see my buddy Joe, a friendly cop that I've known a few months. I had no seeing him in over a week.

He gets out of the car and we catch up with what had happened in the past few days. The Bethesda Hospital fiasco, the days spent at my ex's house, etc. Joe gets on the phone and then asks me if it would be ok if his girlfriend took at look at my foot because she is a medical assistant. Of course I said yes, thanking him,

She drives all they way from their home and 15 minutes later she is not only looking at my left foot, but treating it. She uses Joe's knife wearing surgical gloves and cuts open the blister then uses a triple antibiotic ointment, covers it with gauze and bandages it. On the spot she writes me a prescription which I could fill at Publix for free. Not only that, she gives me the ointment to keep as well.

It is people like Joe and his lovely girlfriend which strengthens my faith in God and in humanity in general. Joe gives me a hoodie before he leaves to continue his patrol.

So yeah, Monday night blessing indeed. I will post one more time to share the good day I had today.

May you walk in the light of God.

Sincerely.

Luis

PS: Sorry about the length of the previous post, but there was a lot of stuff going on during those 2 days.